


The One Thing

by eddiewrites307



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Boys In Love, I love him, M/M, basically a minibiography, cursing, i love sirius too hence why im writing purely in his pov, no happy ending, non detailed relationship, remus is a godsend honestly, sirius' abusive family yay, tw; child abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-06
Updated: 2019-09-06
Packaged: 2020-10-11 09:43:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20544080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eddiewrites307/pseuds/eddiewrites307
Summary: Sirius Black lived his entire life out of spite. Everything he did was to piss off his parents, Snivellus, etc.That is, until he fell for one Remus Lupin.





	The One Thing

Everything Sirius Black did, he did out of spite. Spite for his family, spite for Slytherins and Death Eaters alike, spite for the world.

He simply didn’t know how to live otherwise. Spite was all he knew, thanks to his darling of a mother. So, he worked with it instead of against it. He turned it against her.

He lived for his challengers.

~   
When Sirius was six, it all began. He read the newspaper upside down - he had always been exceptionally clever like that - and ask the simple question. “Father,” not Daddy, never Daddy, “are we the bad guys?”   


His father, ever the calm one, opened his mouth to respond, but his mother shrieked in fury and cast a quick hex Sirius knew he would one day be taught to repeat. So he memorized the words out of anger and pain, and waited.

That night, his mother came across him re-reading the newspaper in the hallway, but before she could get a word out Sirius was repeating those wonderful words and his mother was shrieking in a way he had never heard before. It was the beginning of an era, of a rebellion, with Sirius as both leader and army.

It was everything.

~   


All his admittedly short life, Sirius had been told the same thing. “Once you turn eleven, you’ll go to Hogwarts, you’ll be sorted into Slytherin, and for once you won’t bring shame upon the family.” Sirius kept this rhetoric in his head, simply because he didn’t know there was another option.

Then, he met James Potter on the train.

“ _ I’m  _ going to be Gryffindor.” The little boy boasted, only eleven years old and yet so cocksure. “Where dwell the brave at heart.” He recited, as though he were told it time and time again.

Sirius’ mind immediately backtracked. You didn’t have to be Slytherin?   


He made his decision.

“I’ll be a Gryffindor too, yeah?” He offered the other boy a fist bump. Then he decided, having heard all about the blood-traitor Potters, the next move in his one-man-rebellion. “We’ll be mates!”   


James smiled crookedly from behind large glasses. “Alright. Mates.”

~   


The Sorting Hat went on Sirius’ head of short, neat hair, immediately growling in his ear. “You’re a tricky one, aren’t you? So many places for you to go.”   
_ Gryffindor.  _ He thought firmly, gripping the edges of the dingy little stool, praying to the high heavens his parents wouldn’t be right.

“Gryffindor, eh? I can see it. Big heart, no sense of cowardice...but you would be losing much potential if you weren’t to go in Slytherin…”   


_ Gryffindor. _

“Alright, if you insist.” Then, shouting for the whole hall to hear, “GRYFFINDOR!”   


Sirius tore the Hat off his head in excitement, looking first to James’ beaming face to Lucius Malfoy's furious one.

Sirius had never been happier.

~   


Sirius made his first real friends that year. Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, and of course, James.

~   
The summer after first year was...a lot. It contained complaining from his brother, stoic silence from his father, and worst of all...his mother's rage.

“How DARE you get yourself sorted into that heathens house! We have done EVERYTHING for you, fed you, clothed you, kept you off the STREETS!  _ AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY US?  _ BY GETTING YOURSELF OSTRACIZED BY THE PUREBLOOD COMMUNITY? Look at you, you even  _ look _ like a mongrel now, all unbuttoned shirts and uncut hair! Well! See if I claim you as my son, looking like that!”   


And in Sirius’ mind, through the boredom of another one of his mother’s rants, another idea sparked.

Then, of course, a hex hit him in the face.

But he clung to the idea, safe and sound within his mind.

He was to grow out his hair.

~   


Sure enough, with the aid of magic, Sirius’ hair was touching his shoulders by the halfway point of his second year at Hogwarts. James thought it made him look “kinda gay, mate.” Peter squeaked out that he thought it looked “badass”, only to earn a slightly derisive snort from James.

Remus, upon noticing, lifted a careful hand and twisted a strand between his long fingers, something that gave Sirius an odd, unfamiliar feeling. “I like it.” He said in that soft tone of his, giving Sirius a cautious smile. Sirius beamed back, odd feeling settling warmly in his stomach. 

“Thanks, Rem.” He said happily, giving James a bitchy look, who rolled his eyes back. The other two laughed, and James and Sirius shortly joined in.

~   


Walburga - for he had stopped called her ‘mother’ a long time since - to put it simply, hated it. He screamed, she shouted, she threw hexes about and made threats about far worse fates, but Sirius refused to cut it.

~   


Third year, Sirius found out Remus was a werewolf. When asked, in fear, why Sirius wasn’t scared, the dark-haired boy released a laugh. “Are you kidding? Could you imagine Walburga’s reaction if she found out what my mate was? I wont tell her, but Merlin, could you imagine?”   


He wouldn’t say, however, that it was really the agony in Remus’ amber eyes that kept him from going. He never wanted to see that agony again.

~   


Fourth year, Sirius got his hands on some second year’s stick of kohl, turning it over in his hands, unaware of what to do with it. He asked her, and she giggled at the handsome boy, asking flirtatiously if she could show him. Ignoring her advances, he said yes from curiosity.

The result? Fantastic.

The kohl brought out the silver in his eyes, enlarged them. On top of that, it made him look queer as  _ hell _ , something that woukld undoubtably kill Walburga from a heart attack on the spot. Upon seeing his reaction to his reflection in the mirror, the second year said he could keep it, claiming to have others in her dorm room. Unwilling to part with his new look, Sirius took it.

James said it made him look “like a queer”.

Peter hesitantly agreed.

But Remus, sweet, gentle Remus, gently brushed a hand against Sirius’ cheek. “It suits you.” He declared. “Makes you look like David Bowie, in a way.”   


That, of course, was met by ignorance, and lead to a musical education by Remus for the other boys.

~   


That summer, the Black household was filled with the sounds of rock’n’roll and screaming, due to Sirius enchanting his door closed and blasting his music all day long, only leaving his room at night when food became an absolute necessity.

~   


Fifth year, Sirius kissed Remus.

It was short, it was quick, it was everything and more.

He liked him. And it was reciprocated, in the best way.

It was the only thing Sirius did for himself.

~   


That summer, Sirius went home, stuck his chin up, and proudly told Walburga he was dating a boy.

That night, Sirius experienced the Cruciatus Curse in all it’s despicable glory.

~   


Sirius ran away shortly after being cursed within an inch of his life, packing all he could into one suitcase and going to the only safe haven he knew of.

The Potters.

James opened the door, at 2AM, squinting at Sirius. “Mate, what…?”   


“Miss me?” Sirius said with a winning smile, before he collapsed into tears at James’ feet.

~   


Remus Flooed in the next day, grabbing Sirius with no hesitation and pulling him in for a tight embrace. “You’re alright.” He whispered fiercely. “You're going to be alright.”   


“I love you.” Sirius gasped out, saying it the moment he came to the realization. “I love you.” He repeated numbly.

He had never had anything to love before.

Remus brushed his hair out of his face, smiled thinly. “As I’m sure you must know, I love you too.”

~   


Sixth year was the one year Sirius regretted more than anything else.

Severus Snape, a Slytherin that Sirius and James had always had a rivalry with, kept sticking his big nose in their business, trying to figure out where the four went once a month.

And Sirius, foolishly so, nastily told Snape that if he wanted to know so badly he should go poking around the Whomping WIllow during a full moon. Snape grinned victoriously, and ran off.

Laughing, Sirius told James about the interaction, not expecting the blood to drain from his face.

“Sirius...what have you done?”   


~   


Remus didn’t speak to Sirius for nearly a year. The longest, most painful year of Sirius’ life.

Eventually, they were able to restart, slow but sure. Remus learned to trust Sirius again, and SIrius learned to control his temper.

But then the war came.

And everything went to hell.

~   


Sirius lost everything the night of October 31st, 1981. Everything.

But he lived, out of pure spite. Determination to prove all of them wrong, to show Remus...to show Remus he never should’ve given up on him, and vice versa.

For loving Remus was the one thing Sirius Black had ever done for himself.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in abut 40 min, including a YouTube break, so don't hate on it too harshly


End file.
